Opening Hips and Shoulders with Fierce Grace – to heal the trauma of my accident

It was not a very professional transition from the one and only Bikram class with 26 postures to five different classes with lots of new postures in a number of variations.

Re-branding Bikram into Fierce Grace meant teaching trainers and students.

For my dislocated hip and its effects on the rest of my body, it was god sent despite all the hiccups: the Bikram postures could have turned me into a good footballer. Fierce Grace might make a dancer out of me… ūüôā

In other words: there’s a lot¬†more to stretch in the hip area that has never been stretched before so that the left hip resembles the right one! As a result, I can’t walk without sticks. But I am convinced that this, too, will pass and that I will come out with a healed hip. The question is when!

10 days ago, the Yoga class inspired me to do for myself what I have done for so many victims of white collar crimes: write a one-page summary.¬† (more…)

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40 Years of chronic pain since an accident that I was lucky to survive

Last year I had that dream in which I was told that I would become pain free “probably by the end of the summer”. Unfortunately, that has not happened yet. In fact, it seemed as if the various ‘dodgy areas’ took pleasure in becoming particularly delicate.

But fortunately, the pains change in terms of places and intensity, also depending on how much walking I do of course.

However, regular Bikram sessions keep improving all the bits and pieces: knees, arms, shoulders and, above all, the hip joint.

I cannot but think over these 40 years as a strange kind of waking up:

  • I thought that my then employer CERN had my interest at heart
  • I thought that doctors knew what they were talking about
  • I thought that being self-employed is as straight forward an option as being employed.

Instead, I have come to appreciate huge differences not only between employment and self-employment, but also between ‘being taken care of’ by doctors and looking after one’s own health.

In fact, moving from Geneva, Switzerland, to UK London taught me the notion that the State looks after you ‘from the cradle to the grave’.

Well, it clearly ain’t so:

  1. the State claimed our men to fight wars
  2. then it claimed our women to rebuild what was left
  3. now they are claiming our children for sex, money or both.

(more…)

35 Years after the accident

3.5 years after starting with Bikram Yoga and I KNOW I shall feel like I felt when I was 29 and it happened… My left hip and knee have made such progress! My spine is bendable again! I am virtually pain free and while regaining more and more functionality and flexibility, the real challenge is re-aligning my right and left side.

I am committed to Bikram Yoga until the end of my life. It energises me to do my work which is my life: the professional aspect is on 3D Metrics and the social aspect is on In the Spirit of the Forum for Stable Currencies.

From that followed the online petition Stop the Cash Crumble to Equalize the Credit Crunch.

Published in: on August 30, 2008 at 10:37 pm  Leave a Comment  
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A Symphony of Variations on the Theme of Pain and Suffering

“Much of your pain is self-chosen,” says Kahlil Gibran in his marvellous book The Prophet.
“Your pain is psychological,” doctors said again¬†and again, ever since that accident in 1973…

And what do I think?
I can call it ‘fascinating’ how my body is inventive at creating pains.
I can call it ‘amazing’ how I never know where what will hurt when I walk or move.
And it does not matter what I call it. For it just hurts. This way and that way, here and there.

What have I been learning?
It began with minimising the number of steps, when I was walking with crutches.
It continued with the search for ‘remedies’ and alternatives, physical, psychological and energetic.

And it is an eternal path of self-awareness that has opened:

  • who am I who is hurting?
  • what is pain, if not the other extreme of pleasure?
  • how far do I go to avoid hurt?
  • what happened when I ‘overdid’ it?
  • why did I not know my limits of endurance?

Because my body is as open-ended as Life is.¬† (more…)

Published in: on May 30, 2016 at 12:16 am  Leave a Comment  

#GoFGYourself @FierceGraceYoga From Bikram to FierceGrace: starting my 10th Year of Hot Yoga

“Your leg has not been in the right place, ever since your hip was dislocated.” That’s how¬†my specialised pelvis therapist Alexander Barrie¬†described¬†recently what I have painfully sensed, ever since 1973.

Queens Crescent has been my preferred studio, since I discovered it 10 years ago. Hence I experienced the transition from Bikram to Fierce Grace. It felt as if Bikram turned me into a good footballer, but FG into a better dancer.

Last year I had traumatic reasons for being in Berlin: I needed to flee from prosecution and imprisonment in a secret family court, after I exposed the worst of all child abuse cases. Hence I could go back to doing Bikram for nearly six months.

Here I enjoy the variety of the classes and am proud to be able to do them all, whenever I feel strong enough. At least once, hopefully twice a week. But when I started, I even did the 30-day challenge and Emma gave me an orange Yoga mat.

I shall never forgot how virtually every class ended in tears for the first six months. I got in touch with the emotional pain that surrounds my chronic physical pain:¬† (more…)

Published in: on May 8, 2016 at 10:31 am  Leave a Comment  
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#Health #Wealth and #Beauty in the #Spirit of #HotYoga #BYAS and #Wellstar

I’ve been working on my health ever since that car accident in 1973 when I also discovered that white sugar and white flour are no good for us.

Bikram and Fierce Grace exercises have kept my body and spirit going, despite ‘interesting’ pains in ‘fascinating’ places and completely unexpected movements and moments.

Now I’ve had my third treatment with this smart Face Lifter to add outer beauty to my physical life with pain and inner life journeys. And to become a ‘product of the products’ so that I act as a ‘live demo’ and role model for ageing with grace.

Becoming ‘beautifully healthy’ will include making money for¬†paying programmers to develop my software inventions.

For the business opportunity is as innovative as the products themselves: ‘social club selling’ as a combination of

What more do we want than the right balance between health, wealth and beauty as our individualised lifestyle?

Published in: on December 29, 2015 at 7:23 am  Leave a Comment  

Heal Thyself with #HotYoga and #PelvicCorrection after 42 Years of Pain ‘Management’

Yes, it’s over 42 years since January 1973 when I remembered falling and thinking ‘this must be the end, this must be the ocean.

Well, eventually I discovered the ‘cosmic ocean‘ as the reality that holds and embeds us, the invisible worlds of energies that physics can’t unite between nuclear and astral scales.

And my invention of analysing images in a new way will lead to making pain visible! I just wonder when the wisdom of the universe will want that to come out. Meanwhile, I keep trying and kicking…

Especially after doctors told me that my pain is ‘psychological’, I’ve made the rounds in search of pain relief. But pains are only SYMPTOMS. What matters is to find the CAUSES.

Mis-alignment is an ‘obvious’ cause that I discovered thanks to what was first Bikram Yoga and became Fierce Grace in North London. Since¬†I had to flee UK jurisdiction in February this year, I had the opportunity to practise the 26 Bikram postures in Berlin again. Back in London, I was arrested by Police since I had blown the whistle on the worst of all child abuse cases. That shock and trauma of 10 hours threw me back big time!¬† (more…)

HOW TO Turn Pain into Pleasure? With YogaBabies!

In my recent Yoga practice I have had major highs, feeling like a million Bradburys, thinking that only your body can let you feel such pinnacles of pleasure.

However, I have also felt more acute pains during my practice than before.

And when I was moaning, whining and complaining about this to my inner monitor, this lovely trainer Kate Comer seems to have sensed it. For she came during one of the exercises and stretched my back. I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. Why? Because, it was one of these rare occasions where somebody could relate to my experience and acknowledge it in a soothing way… She also acknowledged this ‘opportunity for letting things come up and go’ when closing the session. It’s ‘nice’ to feel acknowledged, for it’s tough to live with the presence of pain for 40 years, I can assure you.

But when I saw Kate again yesterday, she suggested to call it ‘sensation’ – i.e. take the ‘sting’ out of ‘pain’.¬†She has acquired this experience through Yoga and the birth of her own two babies. Hence she is now passing her knowledge on by teaching classes for Yoga Babies.

I just wish that not only women learned about giving birth with more awareness but also men and women when they make love. Conscious conception is an art never taught in the West. In the East, however, we know of not only the Art of Tantra but also the Tao of Sex!

What is it with this Western male analytical mind that domineered for two millennia? Well, it’s just called evolution of humanity and planet in one universe. Remember: Yoga means unity, unison, oneness…

And in the Western mindset of mathematics I discovered this in terms of time, space and measuring. But that’s going to be another blog post.

STARTING a new 7-year-Cycle of re-locating a dis-located hip

Schematic Examples of CNS Structural Changes i...

Schematic Examples of CNS Structural Changes in chronic pain (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Emma is one of the senior teachers who has accompanied my odyssey since I started Bikram Yoga in 2005. Yesterday I asked her to watch my ‘general mess’, as I’m soo emotional about going to Geneva to celebrate 50 years of Computing @ CERN – where the web was born – my then employer who sent me to Lawrence Radiation Lab. But on the way, the driver, a physicist friend of mine, fell asleep and we fell 24 feet down the motorway…

Taking stock must take place on a number of levels:

The dislocated hip:

  • it feels as if the fine re-location keeps going on, and I only noticed that since about a year;
  • it was only through Bikram Yoga that I became aware of how my body had accommodated for the dislocation;
  • only through Bikram have I experienced the re-alignment that had become necessary and that includes both knees badly!

Pain: 

  • a LOT better, but still often enough bad enough, when every step and both hips hurt in bed;
  • who would have thought that my right arm and shoulder need to hurt these days – to realign everything else, ¬†while relocating my left hip?

Physical well-being:

  • TERRIFIC: instead of ageing, I at least stopped the process, if I haven’t reversed it, counting the number of grey hair.

Mental well-being:

  • those 90 minutes of moving meditation are priceless, in terms of allowing ‘stuff’ to come up and let go.

All in all, I can only count my blessings. But: do I kid myself, maybe? Is there more emotional pain that is waiting to be released? After all, my life has been far from easy with 40 years of chronic pain. But who said it would be a rose garden?

Still. There are soo many people whose lives are soo much harder… I shall keep enjoying mine as much as I possibly can!

Pain – the invisible disability – physical, emotional, mental or “psychological”…

Your pains are “psychological” – that’s what doctors used to say, instead of admitting that they were at their wits’ end… All they were interested in is the mobility of the hip, and I wished that I could make pain visible!

Hardly did I know that this wish should become true! But, the world can’t see yet that and how I can make pain visible by re-visualizing digital images. My prototype software would have to be tuned for particular images from particular imaging technologies to be used for that purpose. But that is one of the possible applications indeed!

Yet a CERN doctor had said “I would NOT suffer in old age”; that’s what saved CERN’s insurance company from having to pay a disability pension. Nobody should be allowed to say anything about ageing unless they are older than 65 themselves!

(more…)

Published in: on April 20, 2011 at 9:32 pm  Leave a Comment  
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